Theoretically, there are two days of the year I wake up happy and early- Christmas and my birthday. Both have changed in the last couple years. Tomorrow is my birthday! Thank you for the well wishes. I completely forgot it was coming, more than just a “my birthday is soon” because I was preparing for… Continue reading 37 years young
It started with back pain…
Disclaimer: this is from a writing class, edited versions might show up later. "It started with back pain." How many times have I started with that line? How many times have I thought it? How many times did I fight with the doctors- no, you're wrong, it's just a pulled muscle! "No," they said again… Continue reading It started with back pain…
Dirty sock kind of tired
I found a single, dirty, white and black kid-sized Disney sock in my purse this morning. If that's not a sign of parenting I don't know what is. You know that feeling when you find money in your winter coat after not wearing it for months? This is the opposite of that feeling. The most… Continue reading Dirty sock kind of tired
The Crazy Girl
(Disclaimer: this is for a writing class. There might be edited versions in the future.) For two years I have written about my pain. My loss. My longing. It has taken me two years to see it- my situation, while unique among my group of friends, is not unique. But I didn’t sign up to… Continue reading The Crazy Girl
Weighted blankets and pool time
Part 1: “So help me God we are outside and you are in a pool so stop wigging out about every bug you see!” That’s what I wanted to yell earlier. I was outside with the kids, sitting in a well worn and partially broken camp chair, supervising play in the new pool, much bigger… Continue reading Weighted blankets and pool time
The memory of being happy
Charlotte was forced into quiet time (and reminded several times) tonight before bed. The puppy is content to chew on a new bone and Orion is napping, do your own thing and leave them be. She chose to look at her baby album. I have always loved photo albums. I would look at the ones… Continue reading The memory of being happy
Something to write about
The blog is 2 years old. An outlet to process my grief has become a full idea, hashtag, and mom identity. Who knew it would have such sustainability? (Also, hooray! Wait... hooray?) In my writing class on Monday I was struck by the thought that I didn’t write a lot before Bob died. I wrote… Continue reading Something to write about
Sunny morning
“Mom, can you make breakfast?” My oldest asks me. The question seems innocent enough. I’m sitting on the side of the couch playing a “relaxing” game/app, my head resting on the arm that’s bent on the edge of the couch. Easy enough. My mind starts to load the morning questions. What should the girls have… Continue reading Sunny morning
Trade skills
I finished my Paralegal certification classes a year ago! I see that has also been put to good use... A year ago the pandemic was just starting. It was almost like a tragic novelty. Virtual school disasters. Snow to summer to snow every other day. Kids home. No shopping. Putting a Walmart pickup order (a… Continue reading Trade skills
Just enough for a panic attack
Solo parenting is hard work. You get all the praise and all setbacks. All the rewards and all the punishment. It’s fun sometimes and hard all the time. Planning, organization, structure- things I live for, right? There’s an unopened bottle of children’s Xyzal on my kitchen pantry waiting to be moved to the bathroom cabinet.… Continue reading Just enough for a panic attack
Solo Mom of Tiny & Loud Dragons 